 November 16, 1956 - October 11, 2019 We’ve spent the last year trying to figure out a way to honor our late friend, Anna James. We adopted our children from abroad and those experiences wove us together. Each of us, and so many others, have used our lived experience to help others who had also adopted internationally. There was no guide book. We relied on each other. Anna’s work connecting adoptive families and birth families in the former Soviet Union countries was pioneering. She touched many, many families. We talked with others who knew Anna and her work, and we decided to offer this simple celebration of life memorial during November 2020, Adoption Awareness Month. Not only do we want to celebrate Anna for forging the way for others, but to also give a forum to others to say something or more broadly let others know about her passing. We also want for her family and friends to know about her important work and the quiet way she touched so many. The last time Beth spoke with Anna, they talked about the book Anna had wanted to write for a long time. Anna founded her birth family search agency in 2002. There are hundreds of families she helped, and they had stories they wanted to share. She wanted to have others recount their adoption searches for themselves or their children. She knew first hand the emotions and challenges of adopting and being adopted. Importantly, she knew the power of a person speaking from learned experience. So, instead of a book of stories of challenge, joy and pain, we are presenting a forum for others to write down what they would like to share about their adoption birth family search journeys with Anna or other searchers. Please join with us as we quietly, respectfully, and intentionally honor Anna James, our friend, by adding a comment on this memorial page. Karen is carrying on Anna’s dream for others. In honor of Anna, we will be launching a fund in Anna’s name to help those adoptees who would like to search for birth parents but do not have the means. With every family we learn about who you helped, and we stand even further in awe of all the lives you touched, Anna. We miss you. We, your international adoption parent friends, are taking the baton forward in new ways to help others. Your important work will continue. Love, Beth, Terry, Amy, Karen Add your messages in Anna’s memory by clicking on the comments link. ~~~ Send photos we can share using the "Message Us" button at the bottom right of this page.
Statements from Adoptees who have received grants from the Fund :
Karen,
I don't know how to express to you our gratitude for your help in getting Vitaly reconnected to his birth family. Thank you. Truly! Vitaly has spent most of today exchanging messages with his sister and brother and I have never seen him look so light. He has seen a picture of his birth parents for the first time in 26 odd years...he looks just like his Dad! Our daughter looks just like Vitaly's Mum. It's so emotional, happy and sad but mostly we are grateful to you. What an incredible gift. Thank you again and forever for your and Anna's hard work. Thank you! Xx Karen, I just checked my email and am reading through the report right now! Thank you so so much, this is truly the best gift I've ever received ♥️♥️
18 Comments
Karen Holt
11/19/2020 08:35:37 pm
Anna and I first meet in 2002 or 2003 in a discussion about birth family search. Later, when I decided to hire a search for my family, I knew Anna and her team were the best choice for us.
Heather Nault
11/20/2020 09:30:20 am
Anna was instrumental in helping us get some deeper answers for our kids regarding their birth family. As they get older, those answers will be vital in helping them process and come to terms with their complicated history. Anna was deeply committed to helping families find each other. She'll be missed.
Beth F
11/20/2020 09:51:06 am
I firstly met Anna around 2008 by phone and email when she helped me do a search for my daughter’s birth family. It was not successful in finding the birth family but it was successful by way of how Anna helped me understand how one day it may be important for my daughter to know I had tried. She was right. In 2012, Anna and I met again on a FRUA member center project and we became fast friends. She regularly wished me a Happy Mother’s Day. She had a true heart and clear vision for helping connect adoptees and birth families. She did it in an unassuming, quiet way. You and your family will always be in my heart, Anna.
Monica Seybold
11/20/2020 03:03:54 pm
Anna was so good to us. I had no real idea what the journey to find their families could mean to us. The boys were so young & I could not really separate my self from theirs enough to comprehend they had another part of their lives that would be a huge part of their individuality & their identity. It financially was so tough to do it but Anna was so patient. My family was not supportive in knowing of their birth families. (Still are not.) Anna was. I am so sorry for the loss of this beautiful woman with a healers heart.
Cheryl Ierna
11/20/2020 05:24:29 pm
I started working with Anna 13 years ago after adopting my girl from KZ. We did eventually find my daughter's birth family, and met them two years ago. Anna was so very helpful, and I will be forever grateful to her for this important work.
Gaagii Lammers
11/20/2020 09:13:20 pm
Oh, goodness, I did not know that Ana had left us! I was thinking of her earlier in the week.
Anne Hollander
11/21/2020 06:31:50 am
Anna helped our daughter put the puzzle of her life together. With her help (and Ruslan’s team) we received priceless information about my daughter’s birth family soon after her adoption, including contact and health information that we could never have otherwise obtained. She helped us make contact with the birth family and we exchanged many photographs and other information. As my daughter grew, we were able to share information that she requested at the appropriate age. It has been essential for her to process the complexity of her early childhood and its effect on her life.
Nancy D
11/21/2020 10:53:40 am
When I first learned about Anna and Ruslan I was skeptical and really didn’t want to open Pandora’s Box. It seemed really unbelievable that we could actually find the mysterious birth family and make a personal connection with them. Was it fair to do this to them? What would we find out? Did we really want to know more? After speaking to Anna, we had a clear path of what we were choosing to do. She didn’t sugar coat anything. She didn’t make false promises. She assured us that our information would be kept confidential and impossible for anyone to contact us except through Anna- if that is what we wanted. We had two successful searches which led to many years of translated letters back and forth through Anna. What we realized is that people are the same all over the world. Love, kindness and trust is the same in all languages. After 13 years of communication through Anna, and absolute secrecy about who we were (we had never disclosed our last name, where we lived or anything to the birth family) something really incredible happened. We decided to connect on social media. SLOWLY, we all developed an even more deep relationship and last year, we went to Russia with our children and had a big family reunion! It was the trip of our lives! 11/30/2020 01:58:39 pm
I'm so sorry to read this sad news of Anna's passing. She helped us find my daughter's birth family in Kazakhstan, and I'll never forget her kindness and encouragement throughout the process. She grieved with me when I found out that my daughter's birth mother had passed, and she celebrated with me when we connected with Arina's maternal grandmother and sister. A few years later, she helped us plan the reunion trip of a lifetime. I had always hoped to meet her in person one day, but such was her generous spirit that I feel close to her despite the fact that we never saw each other face to face ... just heart to heart. With thanks to her team who will continue her mission! All best, Nicole
Tania
11/30/2020 03:43:34 pm
Although we adopted from Russia in 2005, we put off any birth family search for a variety of familiar reasons: we were daunted by the process, we feared the unknown, and we didn’t know whom to trust. After Anna was recommended to us by a friend who had successfully completed a search with her, we took a leap and called. She couldn’t have been more straightforward, and that in itself was reassuring. Moreover, we expected the whole thing to be a long, drawn-out, and draining experience, but Anna and Ruslan were able to find and communicate with our child’s birth mother in a few short months. None of our children’s family stories are ever easy and we don’t know if we’ll be able to make meaningful contact again, but it’s been a huge relief to give our child some answers about her birth family constellation.
Mary Lee Ciminiello
12/6/2020 09:30:29 pm
As my son began to understand the word that he had heard so many times, adoption, he became very concern about the well-being of his birth mother. In his young mind, a mom would only make an adoption plan for her baby if she were in dire straights. I am so very grateful that Anna was able to facilitate a birth mother search on his behalf, and while the findings were not as he would have hoped, he was able to rest in the knowledge that he had located her. Through the years, we emailed from time-to-time. I will miss our electronic chats. Rest in Peace
Madeline
12/7/2020 10:21:42 pm
I had not heard till just now that Anna is gone. She was so very helpful to us in finding our son's family and in figuring out how to do it sensitively. The information she helped us learn was not happy but very helpful.
Jennifer Phillips
12/14/2020 03:19:35 pm
Anna made such a difference in our lives. Anna helped us with such kindness and support as we searched for our son's birth family. I can't imagine where we would be if she hadn't come into our lives. We send our love and appreciation to her family and friends. Thank you for everything, Anna.
Welby Whiting Fairlie
12/14/2020 04:41:12 pm
Anna was awesome at helping us locate our kids birth mothers many years ago. She and Ruslan were relentless in their efforts finding my daughter's birth mom. They did not give up and finally, it came together. I hope she realizes the good she did for everyone and while I often told her, I still feel like I didn't tell her enough. Thank you for establishing this page so her family gets to read how much she meant to all of us adoptive parents.
Kristine
12/17/2020 07:01:04 am
I had not known of Anna’s passing until this post and am saddened by the news. It is evident that Anna touched others the way she did our family. We would not have the information we do without Anna, and are greatful for her efforts
Wendy Hoskins
12/31/2020 09:50:12 pm
I believe that Anna was (and is!) an true angel. Being an adoptee herself, she understood how important it was for adopted children to know their birth history and birth family. When I met her online in 2003, she convinced her Ukrainian contacts to become the first to conduct birth parent searches in Kazakhstan which enabled my adopted daughter to have birth family information and photos. Remember, in those early days searching was not universally accepted by all adopting families or birth families and Anna and her contacts showed considerable courage and determination to help many, many families by expanding their searches to multiple countries. Yes, she's an angel because she organized searches to gather priceless information - adoptees birth family history - which forever allows an adoptee to know the true story of who they are.
Margie P
1/28/2021 04:40:23 pm
With her help and compassion, we found both of our daughters’ birth family. Both of my daughters are in regular contact with their birth sisters. Both of my daughters’ sisters’ name is Victoria Your comment will be posted after it is approved.
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